Memory Lane
Wanna go for a ride with me
Take a lil trip down a road not too many ppl get to see
Come on sit next to me
Lets a take a lil trip to a world that’s realer than any make believe
Take a lil trip down memory lane with me
Here we pass the good times
When I waz young and carefree
The times before i started realizing what a gang could do for me
before I started believin that my pride could save me..
Before a rag hung frum my head
and pride tatted on my sleeves
Yea see that lil girl in pig tails, a frilly dress too
Yea that gurl waz me… way back when you see…
Keep looking. Were not thru wit this ride
We got a lot more yet to see
Take a lil trip wit me..
don’t close ur eyes
This is reality
This is what my life has done for me
Here we go for a real ride
Barely 9. Years old.. Livin life as good as gold
See that man layin there
Thatz my daddy after his accident
After school to the hospital I went
Seein him layin there screws in his head
Barely 10, knowin my dad was half way dead
Never be able to walk again, doctors comin in
Rush us out.. He needs to rest…
that left life for the rest of us
don’t turn your head
Im still not done
This is the way it truly waz
You wanted real.. Here ya go
Take a trip.. In the end you will know…
Here you see me getting a lil older
This is when I started hangin on the streets and the corners
This is the times
I learned what certain words meant
And how fast a dime could get sold…
And a body could fold
This is when I saw first hand
What happens when sum ppl don’t understand
The rules of the game.. Or the rights and wrongs when we play…
Nobody wins and we all bleed the same way
You think you have seen enuf
But we aren’t half way thru
This is the my life
You’re on a ride of a lifetime
Sit back and open up ur eyez
Its ok.. Cry if you need to cry
I still shed tears frum these tired eyes
See that’s me over there.. Wit mah man of the year
My first true love
The man I thought came frum above
Yea that’s him showin me the ropes
Showin me how to finally cope
Yea that’s him too.. On the corner sellin dope
Name of the game.. The one he played
Hes the first one to want me to take his last name
Little kid lust.. Or maybe even love
Ended with a gunshot & blood shed.. Then he drifted up above
Wipe those tears away
Its gonna be ok
Im better now.. Its no longer this way
I kno it hurts to see the truth
Reality hits you and tears you in two
This ride nots over
We aren’t thru
Lets pick up the pieces and ride thru
Here I am again with mah new man
He brought me into a familia
Theres where I got beat up till I couldn’t stand
Thatz the love of bein one of them
Sure their bruises and broken bones
But its ok.. They are juz sore
In the end I will win
With them on my side.. I wont give in
I can’t lose this battle…after all my man is IN
Were still ridin
Rollin thru the memories of my crew
The memories of the times
I shared wit many
and hurtful eyes
don’t mind me.. If I start to cry
juz sit back and ride
that’s my 14th birthday party
See my crew..
My boyz standin there dressed in their blues
that’s a forty in my hand.. Drink after drink…
Till I could no longer stand
The effects they had on me.. HAD me do things
You don’t want to see
But at that time.. That was me
Barely 14.. Barely able to see
anything different than my familia ring
throwin up signs.. that meant everything
part of a clique..I thought would die for me
Had to bury three that year… and I still couldn’t see
come on homie.. take a ride wit me
take a trip down memory lane
we have places to see
Barely 14 skippin skool all the time
I waz too busy out committin crimes
Too busy getting in fights
Shootin bullets.. And runnin in the night
Didn’t sleep, and couldn’t think
Drugs consumed my life.. Made me feel complete
But in the end took thangs so precious frum me
Started shootin to survive
9 in my hand… and no where to run
Never could be found without a gun
Yes your seein right..
That was me.. And this is a picture of my life
I kno it doesn’t seem real
But it was realer than life
I put so many people through senseless strife
Left my mom cryin.. Home alone at night
Sit back while I continue this wild ride
Buried soo many thru this year.
Cried so many unforgotten tears
Poured bottle after bottle out thru the year
Lives.. Lost .. Never too high of a cost
Juz another homie who lost..
Turned 15 while I was still sellin drugs
Shootin ppl and neighborhoods up
My man stood beside me
Till he choose to knock me down
yea that’s me.. With the bruises all around
Seems I said sumthin I shouldn’t have
That one was for looking back
The black eye that time
was frum supposedly talkin to sum guy
Seems he took all my friends frum me
Now all I got left
Is him, my gang, my homies.. And me…
See that’s the life I led
Left so many ppl dead
don’t cry for me…
Im stronger now
Left all that behind sumhow
This isn’t over yet
So sit back and watch all the things that I regret…
Got a call today my dad was dyin
But he still had his bottle sittin beside him
Couldn’t put it down no more
Even though he couldn’t hold it on his own
Sumbody had to help his addiction
This broke my heart
Becuz he lost everything he believed in
I wasn’t doin what he wanted me to be
I wasn’t who he wanted me to be
I remember a time when he too believed in me…
that’s all over now.. Hes finally set free
Maybe frum Heaven he will be able to see me
The tears start fallin now
They wont stop sumhow
Keep ur eyes open and ur mind awake
We aren’t done
And this isn’t fate
Your ridin till the end of the stakes
That’s my 15th birthday
Juz another day… getting wasted before the part’y
Again my boyz by my side
Never leavin alone.. Always showin my pride
I should have been having cake and ice cream
Yet I was finishing a bottle of jose…
Made reality seem easy to me
After about 8 shots.. I could no longer see
Didn’t realize my childhood had been taken frum me…
See how fast things slip away
We have lost so many days
And I still stayed the same way
I watched people die right before me
that’s the life I led…
Now watch as we ride think about what I have said
A few months had since passed
I went out one night for a ride
A Simple ride… questioning if I should stay in the life
Tears fell that frightful night
Hear those screams.. They came frum me
We pulled up to a house bout’ midnight
Shut off all the lights & were gonna sit and talk all night
Got out the car, to go inside
Heard the blasts. Felt the sting
Realized it meant only one thing
All I could do was scream …Seein his blood surround me
As he begged me to not leave
Lost my bestfriend that night… in a blood bath that no one could fight
I retaliated.. And fought my best
No number of bullets could take the rest
They took my heart that night.. And left me cold
What is it getting to hard for you
To real for you to see
To hard for you to think.. This is me
Take a ride.. Sit back and think.. Close ur eyes and realize
This was my gangster life
A few weeks later I got the news
A baby was gonna be born to me and you
Barely 15 and gonna have kid
How would we ever live
Thought you would stand beside me..
The whole time knowin I had to get out for mine
I knew I had to put down that nine
Yea that’s me pregnant and a “G”
I was a gangster.. That was me….
Had to try to stop my addiction
Could no longer get my fix
got depressed and lost a lotta weight
Yea that’s me couldn’t recognize..
In the hospital hooked up to machines
I was so sick and so was the baby inside of me
Its ok to cry those tears
I can see through your fears
Juz take this as a lesson learned
don’t never follow in the footsteps of what you learned
Watch and see.. But don’t ever be like me
Lets take a trip down memory lane…
Theres juz parts of my past..
I will let you see more as time will elapse..
I hope you realized sumthin on ur trip
Its hard to be where you are..
And harder to think about where you been
don’t ever be like me.. NO MATTER WHEN!
Lil Mac